People are pretty screwed up individuals — or, at least, that’s the way most of us come across. It seems as if almost every want and need we have is closely paired with its exact opposite. What we want and/or need seems to contradict itself continuously when observed over a stretch of time.
This can especially be seen when looking at the types of people we date. We date a certain type of person until we decide we are no longer interested in that type. Then, we try to land the exact opposite — convincing ourselves we are testing out the waters and figuring out what exactly it is we are looking for in a partner.
However, these seemingly contradictory urges aren’t actually contradictory. Take women, for example: Every woman will be attracted to what we would call a “Bad Boy” at some point in her life or another.
Every woman will also, inevitably, decide she prefers having a “Good Guy” instead — a guy she can trust to be there for her when she needs him. While most guys do fall closer to one end of the spectrum than the other, it is possible to find guys who possess both the traits of the Bad Boy and the Good Guy.
In fact, that’s what every woman is looking for in her life — even if she doesn’t know it yet. Every woman wants a Bad Boy who is also a Good Guy; here’s why:
1. Bad Boys add much needed drama into your life. You may say you don’t like drama, but that isn’t entirely true, is it? You like drama because drama is what makes you feel alive. It’s what makes you feel as if your life matters. Women love Bad Boys because they allow for an emotional roller coaster ride, which often creates the most memorable moments of our lives — something that is seemingly lacking with the more stable, Good Guys.
2. Good Guys know when to curb that drama. Drama, like all things, is only good in smaller doses. Being reminded we are alive by the emotions that the drama in our lives allows for is only great until it’s not. That’s why you need a Good Guy in your life. He’ll make sure to control his own emotions, words and actions so that the drama doesn’t push you over the edge and away from him.
3. Bad Boys will take you on adventures. They have a knack for thinking outside the box and forcing you to go outside your comfort zone. Most people don’t like to push themselves outside their comfort zones — it makes them feel uncomfortable. Having someone to push you to do the things you wouldn’t normally do allows for a much more fulfilling life.
4. Good Guys will keep you safe. Going on adventures is great… but Bad Boys are often very selfish individuals. They may take you on an adventure, but they may just leave you there. Good Guys, on the other hand, are just as worried about your safety as their own — if not even more so. You don’t just want a man who will push you out of your comfort zone, but one who will also stay by your side on your adventures.
5. Bad Boys are great in bed. Why? Because they’re willing to do and try things that most would consider taboo. Bad Boys are always looking to live out their fantasies and are likely to bring you to new heights of sexual experiences.
6. Good Guys will make love to you. While Bad Boys are all about sex, Good Guys are about making you feel like the amazing and beautiful woman you are. They aren’t just looking to make their sexual fantasies come true, but are also looking to make yours a reality.
7. Bad Boys will make you take risks. Having him by your side will more often than not give you the courage to attempt things you otherwise wouldn’t have been able to find the courage to even try to do. This could mean following some dreams you gave up on long before you started pursuing them.
8. Good Guys know when the risks aren’t worth the rewards. Some risks are worth taking while others aren’t — Good Guys know the difference and feel the need to warn you when they think you may be taking on too much of a gamble. We don’t just need someone in our lives to push us to follow our dreams, but also someone who will tell us when the timing just isn’t right or when the desired outcome is almost certainly unlikely.
9. Bad Boys make great friends. They’re fun to be around. They’re fun to party with, to have new experiences with and to let loose with. They’re the guys who will make sure you always have a fun time.
10. Good Guys make great partners. They are there to support you, to motivate you, to keep you on the right track. They have your back when times are good and when times are bad. They give you the benefit of the doubt and they trust you — a quality few people are willing to offer.
11. Bad Boys will make you feel as if you could lose them at any time. Again, you may think this is a feeling you don’t wish to experience… but that isn’t true. All women — and men for that matter — want to think they could lose the love of their lives. We need to believe we could lose them because it reminds us how much they mean to us. Security in a relationship is a great thing, but 100 percent certainty gets boring.
12. If Good Guys promise you they will never leave you, they will never leave you. The ideal partner is a partner you fear losing every day, but know in your heart will never leave you. Good Guys will be there for you until the end if they continue to find you deserving of their love. The problem is that once we feel entirely safe, we get bored. We need that bit of extra excitement — a bit of uncertainty — to keep the fire alive. You need to find a Bad Boy who managed to turn into a Good Guy in order to get the best of both worlds.